When something as big as losing a loved one, you have spent decades living your life with, side by side, loving that you have found your soulmate, it brings such emotion and a painful sadness to you, that you could never have imagined, even if someone tried to explain it, you would not believe them. I dont find it easy to say out about how I am feeling so I decided to write it down and it has helped when I am having a bad moment or a bad day. I will add posts over the next few months, they wont be in order, they wont be by date but they will reflect some of the emotions that you might identify with if you have been through it. Some posts might be funny, some might be sad and some might seem strange but they are all real. The posts are not edited so they are all reflecting the way I feel when I write them..